Protein Pumpkin Roll Cake

So we at Bariatric Foodie are all about equal opportunity. We believe that post-op WLS patients have the same right to yummy food as everyone else.

We also believe we should have our own indulgences.

The account that follows is my attempt to fulfill an indulgence of my own. Please take note of a few things before we start on this thrilling journey.

#1 - this recipe was not intended to be low-cal or low-fat. Thus, it is an "occasion" treat. Thus, the indulgence

#2 - This was my very first attempt at this so this about as real as it gets

#3 - anyone remotely in the area of Baltimore...please be sure to read the request underlined at the bottom.

Moving right along...

Protein Pumpkin Roll Cake

(oh no she DI'INT...oh yes she did) Ok so our journey starts out with the main ingredients, pictured here:

We start with a very basic protein pumpkin cake batter:
Wet ingredients:
1/2 c. Splenda (modified from original recipe because 1 c. was too much!)
1/2 c. canned pumpkin (not pie filling, but pumpkin)
1/4 c. Brown Sugar Twin
3 tbsp Blue Bonnet Light (or I can't believe it's...yadda...yadda...)
2 large eggs
1 tsp vanilla extract

Dry Ingredients:
5 scoops vanilla whey protein powder
2.5 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp salt

Mix together wet ingredients well. Sift in dry ingredients. Mix until blended. Simple right? It should look something like this:

So once I did that I had to figure out how to make a long, flat cake. Seemed to me the best way to do it was to line a cookie sheet w/ foil, spray it down and cook the cake on that. So that's precisely what I did. And I baked on 350 for 10 minutes. Yes, only 10 minutes. Seriously. Here's what it looked like out of the oven:
Now it is VERY important with roll cakes to let the cake cool. I know you're excited. I was too. But we had to let the thing cool! The cooling process gave me time to contemplate what the heck I was gonna fill this puppy with. I had this whole grand scheme in my head involving ricotta cheese and cream cheese and all that jazz but...being that we just had a blizzard and I was not willing to trek out in the snow to procure ricotta...the cream cheese would have to do. Here's what I used.

Filling:2 - 8 oz. packages Neufchatel cheese (1/3 less fat cream cheese)
1/2 c. Splenda
4 tbsp SF caramel syrup

Yummmmmmmeeeee...oh? Wha? Yes, yes...getting back to it. So I skipped a part actually. Once I took the thing out of the oven I needed to transfer it so I could peel the backing:


Then I lined the first cookie sheet with plastic wrap and transfered the cake back onto it. There...now we're in the right place. So I iced the thing (and it looked so pretty and flat...I was so mesmerized that I forgot to take a pic at this stage). So here came the real test: could a protein cake roll?

It CAN! It DID! So here is the finished product which isn't the greatest looking thing in the world but this was my first time.



And here is what a slice looks like.


Don't ask me how many calories this is. I don't know. Probably a gamillionty seven. As I said above, I was not aiming for low-cal this time. I was aiming for a roll cake. Now that I know this is possible I can work on low-cal. So I know what you are wondering now. How did it taste?

That's where we get back to the Baltimore folks. If you live anywhere near Baltimore City...come help me eat this cake or so help me God you will find me on the floor with pumpkin roll cake hanging out of my mouth and a glazed expression on my face!
...that's it...now go make this. It's good!
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from Bariatric Foodie!

This is some seriously sexy protein

I'm delving into a different kind of protein shake. One for the "grown and sexy" set. Ladies who take martinis in the morning and their lovers in the afternoon and all that jazz...

So why the pic of Eartha Kitt? Well...if she was a post-RNY patient she is EXACTLY the kind of person who would drink this sophisticated shake. (That and...I think grown and sexy and a mental picture of Eartha Kitt pops up...I dunno why)

Chocolate Orange Liquer Protein Shake

8 oz skim milk
1 scoop chocolate whey
1 tbsp unsweetened cocoa powder
1 tbsp sugar-free Davinci Butter Rum syrup
1/2 a sugar-free orange drink stick
1 tablespoon Splenda (I used 1.5 to offset the bitterness of the cocoa)

You can either blend with ice or serve over ice. Use whippage or just put it in a sexy glass and feel sexy sipping it. Go ahead...you know you wanna...

Apple Brown Nikki

So I wasn't going to post this recipe. Because I thought it would be kinda cruddy to post a WLS friendly dessert two days after Thanksgiving. But here's the deal.

This got a command encore.

So here's how the whole thing went down. I bring my sugar-free, high-fiber dessert to Thanksgiving dinner. I advertised it as sugar-free which, theoretically, meant all non-ops would stay far, far away from it. Ate my dinner (two damn bites and I was down for the count y'all) and took a nice nap. Woke up and...found my dessert pillaged??? The culprits? The men. The very ones who recoil at the words "fiber" and "healthy." Go figure.

With crumble spilling from their mouths they managed to mumble "Grmbledeeburblebop" which can be loosely translated as "you have GOT to make this again." So I did!

I call it "Apple Brown Nikki" because a) it has apples b) it is brown c) I am Nikki and I cooked it and d) I, too, am brown

So consider this one of many Christmas presents.

Apple Brown Nikki

5 - 6 Granny Smith Apples peeled, cored, and sliced
3 tbsp Blue Bonnett Light (or I Can't Believe It's Not Butter Light...I'm not picky)
1 cup + 1 tbsp Splenda
1 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp nutmeg
1/2 chopped hazelnuts
1/2 cup chopped walnuts
1 cup Honey Bunches of Oats cereal
1/2 cup Fiber One cereal

Directions:

1. In a pan, melt "butter." Add apples, cup of Splenda, cinnamon, and nutmeg and sautee until apples are considerably softened. Set aside.

2. In a dry pan, toast the hazelnuts and walnuts until browned.

3. In a blender or food processor, combine both types of cereal, remaining Splenda, and nuts until a crumb mixture forms.

4. Place apples in a casserole dish (I used a 9 x 13). Top with crumb mixture and bake at 350 for about 30 minutes or until apple mixture is bubbling up through openings in the crumb AND crumb mixture is brown.

This goes well with fat-free whipped cream (pictured) OR if you are trying to use up all your carb allowance for...um...life...Wal-Mart makes a pretty decent no-sugar added, fat-free vanilla ice cream. I'm just sayin'...

Lemon-Ginger Butternut Squash & Carrot Soup

Ok...so not the best word association. But "orange" ya glad I didn't do that knock-knock joke?

(chirp...chirp...) Ok...moving on...

If you don't like vegetables, quite frankly, I think you might be crazy. Ok, that's mean. But seriously. Veggies have so much to offer in the way of flavor. And flavor is the one thing we THINK we lose in the equation of WLS but really we don't. We just have to change the way we produce flavor.

Take this little gem of a bowl here--I ought to call this beta-carotene in a bowl. But the actual contents kinda sound prettier.

Lemon-ginger butternut squash and carrot soup (long but still better than beta-carotene soup)

You are going to freak at how simple this whole set-up is.

Ingredients:

1 butternut squash, peeled, roasted, and cubed
1 package of shredded carrots (or you could shred them yourself. About a cup and a half)
Juice of one lemon + 1/2 tsp lemon zest
1 can chicken broth
1 cup 0% fat Greek yogurt
2 tsp minced garlic
2 tsp grated ginger
2-3 tbsp Splenda (or to taste)

Directions:

1. Bring chicken broth to a boil, reduce heat, and add garlic, lemon juice and zest and ginger.
2. Once that simmers to a boil add your squash and carrots. Cover and simmer about 30 minutes or so.
3. Add yogurt and, using an immersion blender, blend the mixture until thoroughly pureed. If you don't have an immersion blender, do it in batches in a traditional blender.

This is a bowl of comfort. Seriously. And it's a good way for new post-ops to get their veggies in. If you want to up the protein anty, add about a 1/2 cup - 1 cup reconstituted tvp before blending.

Ok, off to go find a stick of gum...I've eaten too much of this already!

...And the people have spoken

The analytics from this blog show an ASTOUNDING increase in hits after the whoopie pie video. And they also show that people come to this blog looking for sweets.

Ok, so I'll post more sweets - all you hadda do was ask!

But now I need to know what you like. Anything you've wanted since surgery that you have had trouble working in? Anything you thought could NEVER be sugar-free?

In the name of science I am obligated to test my hypothesis that there is nothing you can't make WLS friendly. So come friends...let us put it to the test!

If you have a suggestion or request, post it in the comments. Let's see if we can make magic together!